Sunday 8th - Dear Marmaduke

Dear Marmaduke,

Defecating on such a small sea vessel is difficult. I did not wish to do so in front of such a swarthy old sea dog, my one man crew, and also found that adopting a position over the side of the boat created an undesirable ballast.

I discovered that through careful positioning and sheer English ingenuity, I was able to attach myself to the yard arm, swing free of the boat and was able to shit free of the paint-work which was now beginning to attract sea gulls and flies as a result of my earlier attempts.